You Can Flourish After Divorce

Flourish After Divorce Graphic

Think of marriage as a tree. Once that tree is cut down by the axe called “divorce,” no matter what the reason that led to its demise, the tree begins to die.

You may have gone through an unexpected divorce and feel as if your life is over. Perhaps you feel like you’re dying from the inside out. Your heart has been devastated and your emotions may be all over the place. You reevaluate mutual friendships, and like cutting dead limbs, you cut off certain friendships you distrust. You feel crushed.

There is no doubt that divorce can challenge your will to move on with your life. But you must move on and flourish even when you don’t feel like it.

Trust me; I’ve been there. I was hurt, confused, and desperately trying to continue being strong for my children and me. I eventually made a decision to flourish and continue growing stronger both emotionally and spiritually; and you can too!

You can flourish.

Regardless of the circumstances that led to your marriage ending, there is hope. Again, let me repeat: “THERE IS HOPE!” Yes; you may feel like you’re that dying tree that’s been cut down, but you’re not a tree. You’re a human being with much to live for and so much to accomplish. You simply have to believe it regardless of how complicated your situation may be.

You can flourish.

Below are a few critical things I believe can benefit those who are divorced and feel as if your life is whithering away. If you want to flourish, then root yourself in these principles.

1. Let Go

2. Acknowledge Your Part

3. Stop Fighting With Your Ex

4. Venting on Social Media Is Childish

5. Forgive and Move Forward

6. Don’t Start a New Relationship Too Soon

7. Avoid Turning to Alcohol and Drugs to Ease the Pain

8. Get Professional and Spiritual Counseling

9. Surround Yourself With Good Friends

10. Become Accountable to a Mentor

11. Start Going to a Good Church

12. Don’t Isolate Yourself From Family and Friends

13. Focus on the Future

14. Create a Vision Board

15. Put Legs to Your Dreams

16. [BONUS] Showcase Y.O.U. (Your Outstanding Uniquenes) 

This isn’t a fix-it-quick punch list. Instead, think of it as an injection of hope and encouragement.

Read my blog post “10 Key Reasons to Showcase Your Talent” for future motivation to help you move forward and flourish.

I hope this article was helpful.

Also, here’s my recommended list of books and audiobooks:

  • Forgiveness: Finding Peace Through Letting Go by Adam Hamilton
  • A Man’s Feelings: Finding Closure After Divorce by Michael L. Eads
  • His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage by Willard Harley
  • Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul by John Eldrege
  • Go Put Your Strengths to Work: 6 Powerful Steps to Achieve Outstanding Performance by Marcus Buckingham
  • The Bible by a bunch of inspired guys who had issues but learned to move forward

Here is a great video I recommend for those who want to give marriage a second chance, but may be afraid of repeating past mistakes. Willie Moore Jr. hits the nail on the head in this one!

Please flourish, because you can!

As always,

Stay Focused. Keep Moving. Never Go Back. Trust God!

-Mr. Focus 

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